Posted on Jan 13th, 2023

Coaching is primarily a profession for young people, although occasionally, I see an old Codger who’s still fighting it.

Now, if that old Codger questions why teenagers wear frayed, holey jeans, listen to Barry Manilow songs and always want to take the team to eat at Hometown Buffet after games, then maybe it’s time for him to go fishing.

However, on the other hand, you don’t get old being no fool, either. And, some old basketball coaches are like old western gunfighters — they don’t last in their business unless they’re good. (See Clint Eastwood in the movie, Unforgiven).

Old coaches just need to be careful about not making curfew at the nursing home and being locked out in the cold.

Coaching in the 21st Century

Today, coaches wear many hats. Often, they are psychologists, social workers, a liaison to teachers and administrators, the media, boosters, problem-solver and sometimes even a surrogate parent. At some point, I’ve been the aforementioned.

And, every coach that I know routinely gave money to that kid who, when stopping at a quick mart said, “I don’t want anything”. All of my coaching colleagues would never fail to, inconspicuously, help a kid. That’s a small sum of what coaches do.

Coaches, you’re not going to like every player you have, and they’re not all going to like you either. But, you have to coach them up even if they’re a candidate for Psychology Today magazine. ... The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly.

In 1985, Legendary OSU coach Henry “Hank” Iba invited several of us coaches to come to his home and talk basketball. We stayed till midnight, and he politely said he needed to go to bed. He said, “some of my best boys (players) were ornery and I had to keep an eye on them, but they were fighters, and I liked fighters ... a ‘milquetoast’ won’t fight”.

I understood everything he talked about that night, and I agree, “sometimes you just have to mix a few sinners in with saints. Thank You and RIP, Mr. Iba.

It’s ok not to be popular

Coaching should never be a popularity contest. If it comes to that, do something else.

If I asked high school kids for a show of hands of how many of them had a preschool teacher they didn’t like, I’d probably get none. Then, if I asked about an elementary teacher, a junior high teacher, and lastly, a high school teacher, the hands would increase twofold. And, my reply would be, “Guess what, they may not like some of you, either. But....we all have to work together for the common good of All of us”.

Little is ever accomplished with the mentality of, “I like you just the way I am”.

I once had a tennis player who asked if I had “Favorites” (Tricky question? No). My reply: “Of course I do! I prefer players who are coachable, respectful, work hard and are good teammates”.

She said nothing, turned and walked away, and never implied that again. Truth ... always be prepared to give a teen the right answer.

Entitlement Woes

I despise entitlement because I worked my way up the food chain, paid my dues, no nepotism and no free passes. Just hard work.

People in the corporate world talk about 22-year-old college graduates asking for the same salary that people in the same field are making who have worked 10-15 years. I wonder what people from the Post Depression, WW II era would say to that? Ahh ... the “Greatest Generation”.

When I see sophomores who quit or transfer schools because they won’t start and think they’re too good to play JV. Hey, my reaction is “you little Prima Donnas, go to work, get your nose dirty and earn your way. When I was a sophomore, I suited varsity but played JV, because I just wanted to get better ... and I did. Two years later, I had my choice of several scholarship offers.

Now, that’s the way it’s supposed to work. Thank God I grew up 50 yards from the RR tracks in Hugo, Oklahoma, with a mother who got married at 14, and a father who was fighting Germans in WW II as a teen. No entitlement there.

Unfortunately, part of the Great American Dream lies with parents wanting their children to “have it better than they had it”. Oops! All I have to say about that is to be careful about putting your kids on 3rd base and them thinking THEY hit a triple.

Lessons Learned

Basketball can be a very, very emotional game, one that transitions fast, and it’s crucial that a coach be exemplary and remain under control in order to process quick decisions. This was something I had to work on as a young coach. The more and better a coach can prepare his team in practice, the less coaching he has to do when the popcorn’s popping. But, this is not a certainty.

Upon retiring, I’ve missed preparing a humongous game plan for a worthy adversary, especially when it involved the playoffs where teams had such a short turnaround between opponents.

Case in point — playing Hugo in the Area Finals at ECU in 1986 with the winner going to state.

Even though we were prepared, we could in no way, replicate what we faced that night against Hugo. As a coach, you seldom see such speed and athleticism, and to be honest, my team and I felt overwhelmed.

The game pace was just moving so fast that it’s hard to explain, and early in the game, I didn’t know if we could survive such a talented, well-coached team. Coach Don Hillyard had been my assistant for three years in Hugo, and his assistant, Darnell Shanklin played for me for three years. They knew me well.

The message — “You’re going to be just as tired if you lose as you will be if you win, so we might as well play to win”.

What a magnificent high school basketball game that was in 1986. We had no choice but to fight for literally every breath we took. In regulation, Hugo was up by four and had the ball with only 20 seconds left and a timeout. Many Byng fans headed for the exits. Even Mr. Stokes apologized the next day for leaving early. Anyone that knew Mr. Stokes knows that It took a lot for him to do that.

Somehow, we tied it (this was before the 3-point shot) and we forced overtime. And, then, we forced OT again. We finally won the game in three overtimes. My dress shirt was totally wet and I could not even stand on my rubbery legs. Truth.

It was just the kind of game in which kids truly learned a lot about themselves, me included. And, it was the totality of what athletics should be all about.

The following Saturday we won the 3A State Championship by beating Bishop McGuinness in the finals, 53-44. It was our closest of three wins at state and the Hugo game had prepared us well.

Overall, through the ‘86 playoffs, we beat No. 10 Ada, No. 8 Tuttle, No. 6 Hugo, No. 3 Deer Creek, No. 2 Harrah and No. 4 Bishop McGuinness, who upset No. 1 Millwood in the semis. That’s six Top 10 opponents. There was nothing left on the table.

Original Post: Today the coaching profession is made mostly for young folks